Valentine's Day

Today is Valentine's Day! One of those days that when people are excited or not. There have been many interesting posts and comments on Facebook today expressing those very thoughts. One was commenting on the request to post the picture of yourself and your significant other/spouse.....this person was glad that they had changed their profile picture the previous day.....to a plate of cookies....I laughed so much! Another one was a post about being single on Valentine's Day and being okay with it and that they are secure in their singleness....I totally appreciated that from such a young woman. There were sweet posts of songs played at weddings and songs from special moments. One of my favorites was quite simple: (but you have to know them to know how absolutely true it is) I met my husband at church and we have been married for 19 years. I am blessed!
I received an unexpected Valentine today. It was from Scott, my ex-fiance. I was apprehensive to open it because we have struggled a bit to keep "being friends" even after the break-up. Mostly because I needed to move on and he was sure I was going to change my mind and really wanted to persuade me. This saddened me because I really wanted to move past all of that and be friends. We were great friends. We talked, we laughed, and we liked being in each others company.
He is a wonderful, Godly man. He just has some beliefs that I just wouldn't live with. Believe me, I tried to do it and I was willing to do it on a permanent basis. I know now that I had friends who were praying for me and a few who were willing to tell me that I really needed to re-evaluate this whole thing.
When Scott and I met, it was the most amazing experience. Everything I could have ever wanted and everything I ever expected was part of that time. We believed very strongly in courtship and loved it. I could hardly believe that this was happening to me. I felt so blessed that I had honored God with my life and this was my reward. Things were great! We were engaged with 1 month!
Then I realized that there were rules to follow. I even started writing them down so I could refresh my memory before we went anywhere. My hardest was not being able to speak in a conversation unless I was addressed to be part of the conversation. He knew me. He saw me interact with people.
Later on in the relationship I worked very hard at being who he wanted me to be. People noticed and that is when many friends became concerned. One day we were together and there was an incident. I had spoken into a conversation without being addressed into it. Scott called me over to discuss it and stated what my position should have been. He finished and there was a silence. For the first time I said to him, "What if I don't want to?" He was so surprised.
I can do anything. I can make anything work. I can do whatever it takes to make things happen. I wanted so much for this to work. I loved everything else about our relationship. God had to show me that I was responsible to Him first. That type of life was not going to bring honor and glory to God. It would only bring me unhappiness because I wasn't following the path that god had for me.
Looking back, I can see how God used that entire situation to teach me some wonderful things about myself and about God. He also used that time to open my heart and mind up in ways that were previously not possible.
Because God was in it, I have been able to share that story with a few women as a way to let them know about God's amazing love. How "God works all things together for good for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28.
Things between us are much better as evidenced by my surprise valentine card. I took some time to thank the Lord for doing amazing and wonderful things.
I will be calling Scott tonight to thank him for the card and his kind words. It is a beautiful "For A Special Friend" card. The words were wonderful and his note tremendous. I think it will be one of the best phone calls we have had in a very long time. Thank you, Lord!
(Oh, by the way, I slept quite well last night. Spent the day today with my nephews making Valentines at Charlie & Mel's. Looks like another great night of sleeping! :) )